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There's no denying that some strategic ink can put a nice finish of menace on a guy who's already 6'4 and weighs 300 pounds, even if he is standing there wearing a neon pink and green Speedo and covered in pan-fry oil. But then again, tattoos are just as easy to mess up, causing the wearer to betray his trailer-park upbringing. Here's what happens when wrestling tattoos go wrong. If there's any you think are better/worse, please leave a comment!


300px-Mrkennedy tattoo
Mr. Kennedy

As far as we know, this is the only Kennedy with a clown tattoo. It's possible one day we'll find some leaked White House documents that show JFK had a back full of clown gang (or "posse") insignia, and that his assassination was really the result of a rival circus troupe's hit. Until then, though, all we can tell is Mr. Kennedy looks like an idiot (his facial expression nicely reinforces this).
300px-Shannon moore tattoo
Shannon Moore

The artist who did this ink was originally commissioned to do a design that read "Hard Knux", as these knux are, in fact, quite hard. But as he was working, the artist's mind started to wander, thinking about the terrible play on words, and then he started thinking about Fort Knox, and well, here we are. I don't know if that's true or not, but it's a much more interesting story than the person who has knuckle tattoos would be able to tell you.
300px-Batista tattoo
Batista

Not only does this navel tattoo invite a Pillsbury Doughboy-style tummy poke (still, you probably shouldn't try it - aside from the invitation to violence, you'd also wind up with a finger covered in posing oil), it also looks like a fifth grader drew it on with magic marker.
Edge tattoo
Edge

What was supposed to be a star ends up looking like a poinsettia. Which does not, unfortunately, mean Edge would adequately double as a holiday centerpiece. He'd probably start sweating a lot, crouched up on the table between the steaming mashed potatoes and green bean casserole. He'd also definitely need to use a hair net. No, best to stick with the traditional potted-plant variety, and save any Edges you might have accumulated for the kid's table where durability is more important than appearance. "Never gonna stop" averting my eyes from your weird tat.
Umaga
Umaga

Between the tattoos and the face paint it's hard to tell whether Umaga is a wrestler or a human tiki lamp. Well, not really, as most tiki lamps aren't that doughy around the midsection.
Cm punk tattoo
CM Punk

The elements that make up this design are very telling about CM Punk's personality. See, the cards represent the fact that he's an ace, and the water are that he's a free spirit, free like the waves. The flames are obviously indicative of his fiery personality and burning passion, and hey - who doesn't like a nice cold Pepsi? It's a quality beverage!
Christian wwe tattoo
Christian

Is this supposed to be intimidating? I guess it's like a muscular bulldog? Or something? The end result looks like a pig made of gummi. Note to would-be tattoo enthusiasts: don't copy your flash from a phone book ad for a moving company.
Raven tattoo
Raven

Honestly, I'm not even sure what this is supposed to mean. Is there some property of rust that makes it more energetic than other corrosive substances? Or is it a metaphor describing rust's vigilance? I mean, I don't know - I personally have never been on the run from oxidated iron - I guess it's particularly tenacious? And a sword figures in there somehow. What I do know is any tattoo you need to write a manifesto to explain isn't a good one.
300px-Godfather tattoo
Godfather

Godfather's order at the tattoo shop was something like, "You know what? Make me look terrible. Just downright awful. I want to scare children and old people, and then I'm going to put on weight so that when I fold my arms it looks like I'm cradling a couple of novelty Halloween pillows from Specncer's stuffed with ground chuck. Yeah, that sounds about right."
Bambamtattoo
Bam Bam Bigelow

When you get a tattoo on your face or head, being a pro wrestler is one of the few career paths that actually remain open to you, aside from "menacing alley denizen", "gimp" or "long-term unemployment". Unfortunately for Bam Bam, he chose to get his in the shape of Mickey Mouse's facial markings. Also, he's pretty fat.

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