American Beetle

Biography
American Beetle is champion boxer displays American-style courage and punching skill. Unfortunately also is unpleasant disposition. He thinks was famous American president. Face is distinctive with the bug-type look, of genus Sludgfundus Twofacednus, but is ugly because is five hundred foot tall boxing insect. Having gloves made from steel and also bondo. Last sighting was bugging Oval Office.

Real American Hero
American Beetle used to be the smarmiest character in live monster wrestling, the kind of huckster Hero who'd steal your shirt and then try to sell it back to you. The jingoistic insect was never blatantly bad, per se, but his demeanor always seemed dishonest, and his pre-match rants were always so full of slippery rhetoric that his words dribbled duplicity. American Beetle was the kind of Hero you wouldn't trust with your sister ø after all, he wore spandex.

But lately, American Beetle's been acting more like a cheeseball than pork-barrel politician ø a shift in behavior that might simply be a campaign strategy. Patriotic sap or crooked demagogue ø either way ø American Beetle is a delusional pest who intently believes he's a former American president running for re-election. His actual origins are far less glamorous, and far less Texan: American Beetle is the son of an immigrant single-mother who was so grateful for the U.S.'s minimum wage, food stamps, and bilingual education, she dressed her offspring exclusively in Captain America Underoos. Every morning, American Beetle's alarm screeched "God Bless America"; every night, his mother made him recite the Pledge of Allegiance before bed. And until Beetle's twenty-first birthday, his mom only let the young patriot date females named Jackie, Betty, Nancy, Rosalynn, Mamie, and Lady Bird.

Thus it's no wonder that the Star Spangled Banner now blinds American Beetle. These days, the boxer-wrestler swears his only mission is to make his "sweet land of liberty" great again, and to defend its people from evildoers like Dr. Cube. This dizzy love for the United States has led him not only to establish ties with paramilitary extremist groups in the southwest, but also to buy Kid Rock CDs and to register as a Republican voter.

Live monster wrestling analysts speculate that Beetle has little genuine concern for America, and that his performance in Kaiju Big Battel is merely a superficial effort to gain the respect of his beloved mother. Although there is much speculation that American Beetle is the son of Uchu Chu, American Beetle really does not know; he never met his father. Nonetheless, fans agree: filial mystery is good for heroic story lines.